Posts by Francine & Byron Pirola
Smart Dating #3: 21st Century Courtship
Dating With Purpose In times past, dating and courtship were closely linked to marriage in a clear sequence of relationship development. Dating was a low-commitment means of getting to know a person in their character. Once one individual was singled out for special attention, courtship followed and the unspoken assumption was that this was a…
Read MoreSmart Dating #2: Ask ‘Why’ before you Try
Sexual Compatibility Since the 1960’s the slogan ‘try before you buy’ became a common excuse for premarital sex. It’s still popular today and has underpinned the rise in cohabitation. We’ve been led to believe that ‘sexual compatibility’ is the most influential factor in a successful marriage. Of course when you think it through, the line…
Read MoreTo Have and to Hold
The Meaning How often have we heard those classic words from the silver screen or at a church wedding! At its most basic, “To Have and To Hold” refers to the physical embrace of husband and wife. “To have” is to receive without reservation the total self-gift of the other. It’s not a statement of…
Read MoreCohabitation Myth
Many dating couples opt to live together before deciding to marry, because they believe that it is a responsible and prudent thing to do. They reason that cohabitating together will be like a trial marriage. They will learn all about each other’s habits and discover whether they are truly compatible. And when they do finally…
Read MoreMarrying the ‘Right’ Person
We came across a really interesting article the other day – You Never Marry the Right Person, By Timothy Keller. The author makes some really great points. Firstly, the Soul Mate thing that is so common among ‘marriage seekers’. We have this belief, that if we can just find our soul mate, that perfectly compatible…
Read MoreNew Product: Grateful
Joy-filled Couples We all love to be around joy-filled couples. Their good humour and welcoming generosity make their homes places of hospitality for all their visitors and friends. People leave their presence refreshed and uplifted by their joyous delight in each other. A well-developed sense of gratitude is one of the distinguishing characteristics of happy…
Read MoreSmart Dating #1: The Serial Relationship Trap
From university campuses to the work place, the unspoken rules of 21st century dating are that sex is expected, commitment and fidelity are optional, and marriage is a dirty word. Most people will enter a series of intense romantic relationships before marriage becomes a serious possibility, some starting the process of serial dating in their…
Read MoreThe Search for Meaning
Recently, we came across this video of Viktor Frankl giving a lecture on the Search for Meaning. In it he makes the point, that “if we take man as he is, we make him worse, but if we take him as he should be we make him capable of becoming what he can be”. Pointing…
Read MoreThe Sleep Deprived Marriage
I remember my parents once advising us as newlyweds: ‘Don’t go cheap on your bed! One of the best things you can do for your marriage is make sure you get good sleep.’ At the time, we were rather bemused. However, nineteen years of marriage and five children later let there be no doubt, this…
Read MoreThe Commitment Challenge #3
Sex and Committed Relationships In a recent discussion at a youth conference, it was put to us by some of the participants that pre-marital sex was acceptable as long as it was a ‘committed’ relationship. Casual sex was seen to be inappropriate and perhaps dangerous, but if the couple were in a committed dating situation,…
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